Tuesday, March 31, 2015
Prayer Challenge Day 31
I generally have a very hot temper. At the flip of a switch (I guess located deep in the darkness of my frontal lobe) I can become so angry that:
a) My blood pressure rises astronomically. I know this because I feel the heat that generates and can hear my blood pulsing through my veins in my own ears.
b) My teeth gnash together.
c) My mind races and then eventually spews words out of that hole on my face that can never ever be retracted.
I don't hit or get physical. But I do say things that twenty minutes later....normally....I am regretting.
I'm not slow to anger.
My husband is slow to anger. He can sit back or walk away or even better....push it down deep inside so he "doesn't have to deal with it." I didn't mean even better in a an even better way!!!
No, not me I don't want to die from being a bottled up mess of anger and resentment. You keep your passive. I'll keep my aggressive.
Or will I?
I've known about my "quick to anger" side for quite a while. No denial here! I know I have it. Over the past few months I've worked hard, very hard, to control that side of me. It was difficult at first because I would become so angry that I would say, "whatever, self, I'm mad and I have every right to be."
Until I realized, I did not have every right to be mad.
I had every right to be upset but I also had to realize that every time I was angered it was killing some of my well being and potentially risking relationships.
Over the few months that I have been working on my new & improved slow to anger self I have seen good changes in how I feel. Dare I say I've been quite proud that things that riled me up before I now see in a different light. I'm calmer and I try to see the complete picture before I go off the deep end with rage.
Some of you feel me. You know what its like to be a person who angers easily and has trust issues and questions a lot more than maybe they should.
Today I challenge you to pray for help in the areas of anger. Pray to be a person who is slow to anger and can resist the urge to speak and embrace the urge to think. Think about what has made you so ill and see what a better response is other than screaming your head off and saying words that cannot be forgotten.
All it takes is ten seconds and a walk away to start being a healthier and happier you.
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