Officially speaking!

1.23.13  It is official.

I am a cat owner.  Let it be known.  Dear Jesus is this me mellowing out past my 20's?  I never liked these beasts aside from when I was ten.  Now as I type this calico fur bundle is sleeping away in the chair beside me.  She acts like she likes me.  I do not know why.  I do not pet her but once a day and I only pick her up to take her outside so she can do what normal cats should do - climb trees, chase small creatures, bask in the sun.  I am finding that is not what normal cats do but what feral cats do.  Normal cats sleep...in chairs....in heated homes.  Normal cats eat....alot.  Normal cats....are boring.

She makes my little doggie look so much more precious.

My cat is very in charge of every situation.  That food bowl that is obviously my dog's - no more its hers.  She's also extremely arrogant.  "Here Cathy, c'mon lets go in here..."  she sits up straight and stares me down as if to say - "Um no you stupid human I will decide when and where I go.  Go boss around your dog."

She's all about herself.  She's the girl you hated in high school.

Until my little girl pops up.  She carries the cat around like a sack of potatoes and the cat just tolerates it.

It amazes me.  She should be clawing and biting but she suddenly becomes submissive to a little blonde. 

I realize she's plotting her attack....her stealth attack.

**********************

So yes I have a cat now and the only reason that becomes concrete is because today...I bought cat litter.  <Shaking my head slowly in a no no fashion with eyes closed>

I wonder if in my book of life that was written a long time ago it said - "And the girl will submit to feline at age 31 and will take the drive of shame to purchase cat litter for the animal who has now invaded her space that she has ultimately allowed to invade her space."

Or maybe....

"And the girl who is now a woman will submit to feline who will be calico who her daughter will go bonkers over and carry around and say how much she loves the feline.  Therefore, she will make the trip to the big store by the interstate to purchase necessities for the adored kitty of her daughter.  She will be a good mommy for this."

Or maybe....

"Mickey and Minnie were no more because of a feline allowed to hang out in her house so she became a cat owner.  The fact her kid was so in love with the mouse killer iced the cake on keeping it around.  She will forever be a dog freak and now cat tolerator."

Yep that's it.

************************

So a lot of people liked me rant on getting the female exam.  Some of you mentioned menopause to me.  Ok I haven't got there yet so slow down you "playpen installation" women.  But I will write on it sometime.  I mean lets just throw up all the joys of womanhood shall we?  Maybe we will devote February to the cause of women's glorious health.  I mean it is already GO RED month for heart health.  I'm sure I can twist some health issues into something fun to talk about.  It may not be a drop your panties party but leave it to my sly brain to find something catchy for you. 

It is official, I'm a blogger.

I've also had some requests of discussion of money.  Ergh.  Yeah that crap.  So perhaps yes.

A LOT of people want to know about my theological beliefs.  I throw a lot of stuff at ya sometimes and people have said they just don't get what I am.  Oh I can tell ya.  Maybe I'll put a few blogs together in the future on that one.  I may need a disclaimer on it.

Parenting - well you know I'm such an expert - said no one ever.  But I'll share my issues.

Marriage - got the biggest group of emails ever.  I'm not Dr. Phil or whoever talks about marriage but I can share things I have learned and observed.  That's fine and dandy.  Marriage is pretty insane ya know.  I mean seriously.

My humor has also got a lot of emails.  So far everybody likes the line about crying in the bathroom due to lack of water intake.  So funny how reality causes us to bust a gut.

Lastly, someone said they wanted to follow my blog but do not know how.  Guess what?  Neither do I.  Just click around or favorite me in your bookmarks and check for updates.  And thanks to those of you who have shared my bloggy poo.  Please do continue!

************************

Preschool started back today so I'm going to end this blog right here and jump on some chili making - vegan chili honey.  Oh yes.  I will share this recipe with you...but not today!

Today I order you to grab a cup of coffee and brownie and be so unhealthy.  You deserve it.

************************

Until we meet again -


Brownie