Monday - already? Last week I had an extra day and a half off and boy did I enjoy that! We won't talk about how it makes Monday that much more devastating to face (slam the alarm clock!)
I have a lot to fill you in on.
Last Monday was my daughter's first riding lesson. Guys, she did awesome. The trainer she is working with is simply amazing - a whisperer if you will.
My daughter had been extremely afraid after being thrown off Molly. She wouldn't even touch a horse after that happened. When Prissy Buns came to live in the pasture my little girl was still a nervous wreck. Though she did attempt to get back in the saddle she was overcome with fear. I'm not kidding when I say she was out just as quick as she was up.
Being her mom I'm somewhat (I think and hope) in tune with her and I could tell she wanted to ride. There was the fear from having trusted an animal and it not-so-gently letting her down but there was also something in her actions around the same animal that said she wanted to do it.
She was just overcome by fear.
Last Monday I was nervous for my girl C. Lately I have noticed she is becoming less self confident and my mama heart was breaking. Her excitement for the lesson was off the charts but in the back of my mind I worried she would panic and be in tears once she was faced with getting on the back of a horse again.
I didn't want my baby to be embarrassed. I didn't want her to feel like she couldn't do this.
As moms we want to take sickness and pain from our babies.
We want to remove self doubt and raise them up as high as we can.
Too many times we think the cure is to surround them, coddle them, and give them no room of their own to try. It isn't that we don't want them to try it is just that as moms we have a fear of their failure too.
Arriving at the ring we were surrounded by girls of all ages and all levels of riding. I imagine for an eight year old girl who wants to ride so badly it was magical in a way; being surrounded by various horse breeds and girls who cold maneuver about with ease on these huge animals.
It was also overwhelming.
I could see the uneasiness building up in my girl.
Why couldn't I take it from her and give her all the self confidence she needs?
If you're not a mom then I'll let you in on a secret that will make you ever so successful anytime you deal with children for long periods of time. Sometimes mamas need to ease away so that their kids can do their best.
I eased away.
While my girl was in the stable I was sitting out staring at an empty horse ring - saying little prayers that this would be a good experience.
To cut down on this post I want to share this with you -
There were tears.
There was fear.
There was shouting and crying.
Then there was a girl who told me a couple days before - "Mama I just want to be able to ride a horse and not be afraid," in the saddle - smiling, finally - and then out of the saddle and rubbing and talking to a horse that just a hour before she was shying away from.
On the way home the talking from the backseat was incessant.
That was so fun. That horse is amazing! Did you see me? I cannot wait to go back. I want to ride tomorrow. Can you please ask if I can come back tomorrow?
We spend a lot of time worrying about our kids. We want the school work to be perfect and their manners impeccable. As moms we want their worlds to be without a crease, nick, or worry. Our lives revolve around their lives.
But sometimes if we ease away a little bit - they do something amazing.
