Take me to the cross....

I am not a Bible thumper I'm a normal person who keeps the majority of her faith to herself unless asked about it.  I will tell you I love my faith and love my Jesus but I will never throw it in your face.  I have respect for all religions.  This post is a little more than what some of you may have bargained for but when it is weighing on my brain for days on end it has to come out in a post.  I am not putting up a disclaimer and I'm not saying sorry if I offend anyone because...I'm not sorry.

I grew up watching Billy Graham on the television set at my Mammaw & Pappaw's house.  I remember playing on the floor during his crusades and my Pappaw would be "amen-ing" while my Mammaw would be going over the next day's Sunday School lesson.

I didn't think much back then about Billy Graham.  I was a kid.  I was coloring, playing with dolls, eating popcorn, in deep thought about things to get into.  However, I knew who Billy Graham was.  I knew he was a preacher and he was from somewhere down the road.  

I also knew...at a pretty young age...what he stood for.  Billy Graham stood for Jesus Christ.  He had a strong voice and was a big man on that television screen.  I remember him getting excited and the voice going deeper and louder. I'm not sure if it was the words or the crowds of people that really caught my attention.  It doesn't matter....I heard him even as I watched people weep in the crowds, hold up their hands, and shout for joy.

Billy Graham was a part of my childhood as much as Cheerwine and Cheese Doodles.  Billy Graham wasn't a novelty to me because I wasn't a stranger to what he was talking about.  I knew about Jesus...I knew he was born as the Son of God and I knew He died on a cross for me - a ten year old girl in North Carolina wearing a Duke basketball tee shirt.  I knew Jesus loved me and not just because that's the first song I was (probably) taught. 

 I knew Jesus.

After the Crusade would go off my Pappaw would ask me "A-manda (the A always pronounced apart from the rest of my name) do you know Jesus Christ died for you?"

And not even looking at him I would respond with a tween sigh and moan, "Yes Pappaw I know."

He would conclude with, "If you let him in your heart you will always be alright."

Then my Mammaw would interject - "She knows."

----

So this past week Billy Graham released what will probably be his last message.  He's no longer the black haired, leather skin man of my childhood.  He's now ninety-five.  This time around I wasn't sitting on the floor in a living room coloring a picture with him in the background.  This time I was in a kitchen with a laptop on, feeding my son, watching....crying.

For the first time I was really paying attention to the words from that man's mouth.  I stopped and really took a long look at him when he spoke.  Even though I know his voice this was the first time I heard his voice.

The crusades of the 80s and 90s are long gone.  Billy Graham's message is now geared to us...the kids who are a little older than we were twenty years ago.  

Come to Jesus.  

The world is in a place where we are losing sight of what matters.  We think that money and labels and hood ornaments make us who we are but all it makes us is more ridiculous, out of control, and ill willed.  

We think going to church is all we need to do and if we go to the "right" church then we're getting free passes to Heaven.  

We think wrong.  

We are filth, we are grime, and we are unworthy.  

Every day we become more detestable as we do the nastiest things imaginable. 

 I am guilty and every person who reads my blog has dirty hands as well.  

We are nothing but stupid humans who put ourselves on pedestals of rust mistaken for gold.  

I know I'm a sinner.  I sin every day of my life.  Get me at the right time and you'll find me in tears over something stupid I have done.  I can admit it to you because I am ashamed but I know you're the exact same way --- just not so quick to admit it yourself.  I do things I know I shouldn't do.  I talk bad about people, I cuss, I have ill will thoughts, I put myself first. 

 I am quick to do all the things I shouldn't do and slow to do the things Jesus would delight in me doing.

But at the end of the day when I'm alone and I have that time to cry for something I have done or something that has been done to me I am reminded of something...

I am made in the image of God.

For free I was created by the Creator to be a mirror of Him...

What?

But I allow sin to take this image and mess it up.  It takes hard work to keep that image untarnished and no one will have a squeaky clean reflection until the day comes that we put aside all our human glorification and whole heartedly glorify the:

Father

Son

Holy Ghost

In closing, I am saddened that Mr. Graham will be but a man in a history book soon.  However, I know he will have a beautiful welcoming when he returns to the Heavenly Father.  I just hope I can be an ounce of as much of an intentional child of God that he has been for this world for the past 95 years.

Billy Graham