Giving Up

The experience of my life right now have been eating me.  I have tried to remain peppy and upbeat and be the cheerleader of myself and my husband.

I hit my breaking point the other night.

So many things have been up in the air and suddenly we have hit over drive without wanting or expecting it happen.  Life does indeed throw us curve balls.  They always seem to curve to the right and be sailing straight to our heads.

Things always pop up when you least expect them and in cases such as mine things pop up when you are expecting them too.  However, I did get an unexpected glitch in my system last week and it has been eating my gut and nerves for days now.

Doesn't it say in a popular book that nothing is made to be easy?  I believe it does.  

So the other night when I had time to myself to sit alone and stare out into the wild blue yonder I did something I haven't done in a long time.

I gave it up.

All the stress

All the fear

All the worry

I gave it up to the big guy in the sky.  I told him I didn't want it and I didn't need it.  I asked him to strip it and deal with it.  

My frustrations came out like the water when a dam breaks.  There it flooded in my front yard out of me and evaporated up to Him.  Gone.

Though I am human and I will continue to harbor some worry and angst and fear I can honestly say I do not feel that burden so heavily on my shoulders any more.  It has eased.

I am only human and I can only do so much....let the Big Man take the brunt and watch the rain end and colors appear.