5 on Friday: Stuff I learned on a Thursday

It may be sappy.

 

Five things I've come to find out this week - as an upcoming Kindergarten mom.

 

 

 

1.  I can prepare myself 110% and I'm not ready.

 

We went into her classroom to a swarm of kids and parents standing around talking, filling out papers, playing, just looking around.  It wasn't much to me until we found her seat.  Seeing her name on the table flipped a switch and I felt my throat swell and my eyes bubble.  That whole surreal - "This is really happening" hit me.

 

I thought I had it under control.  We've done preschool and I'm used to seeing her name on handwriting paper, laminated, and neatly placed. This time for some reason was different.  I kept saying - why is this so different, I've done this twice before? 

 

Well...its different because I know that Kindergarten is the gateway to brand new everything.  She's going to be influenced by kids I don't know.  She's going to have her feeling hurt.  She's going to do great work and she's going to find that some things may be more of a struggle.  The safety net of preschool and praying time has came and gone.  It is time to see what my little girl shapes into with less of mommy guiding and more of her own instincts leading the way. 

 

2.  My child looks older having already spent time in her classroom.

 

We were only in her new learning environment for about thirty minutes.  Walking in she held my hand and stayed by my side.  Within five minutes of being there she was off playing and I was filling out paperwork.  I'd look around for her to see her doing just fine exploring on her own.  When we left and took the walk home I saw her differently - a big girl.  She was excited and ready to go back.  Did she morph when I wasn't looking?  From my little girl to my little big girl?  I guess so.

 

 

3.  Having a baby at home doesn't ease the transition.

 

I thought it would.  I thought well I'll be just fine because I have my widdle biddy boy at home.  Negative.  Realizing how fast my little girl has gone from my tummy to the classroom only makes me realize that these tender years fly by ever so quickly.  I have to seriously cherish the last time I have a tiny person in my home.

 

4.  Her lunch hour is when I'm working.

 

This suddenly means a lot.  I want to be able to attend lunch times with her for certain events.  Luckily, I have a superior who believes in putting your kids first.  Everyone doesn't get that blessing.  So yep I can make that birthday lunch.

 

5.  I've tried so hard.

 

For the past six years I have tried so incredibly hard to build a smart, kind, happy, grounded little person.  I have read to her nearly every night.  I have prayed with her.  I have made sure that she got a good mama who has always let her know my love for her is endless.  She's not just a kid to me she's my angel, my amazing little gift.  She's my everything.  Sitting in that classroom I realize not every child gets that experience with their parents.  That breaks my heart.  I just pray that my most complicated and rich work of trying to be the best mom for my child radiates to all of those around her.  I hope she passes love and friendship and kind words to her classmates and teachers.  If that is felt I will feel like I have done a good job thus far and can take the next steps with her with my head held high and a smile

 

Yeah, Monday may sting a little bit.  My tears are extra salty.